1
2
3
4
F
  Bagels
50
0
6
0
56
  Sunrise
0
31
13
0
44

Cincinnati Bagels @ Tequila Sunrise: A Sunrise That Never Shined

In a game where Tequila needed a strong performance to maintain their dominance in the West, the Cincinnati Bagels brought the brunch mimosas—and they didn’t spill a drop. Jordan Addison finally remembered he’s supposed to play football this season, leading the Bagels to a surprising and crucial victory 56-44.

Patrick Mahomes threw for 329 yards and three touchdowns, giving the Sunrise fans hope. "I can't throw AND catch the ball," Mahomes quipped postgame. "Although, at this point, maybe I should try."

After 12 weeks of doing his best "invisible man" impression, Jordan Addison exploded for 162 yards and a touchdown. "Guess I woke up," Addison said. "Tequila’s defense made it really easy—felt like I was running routes in an empty parking lot."

A star player known for his consistency, Amon-Ra St. Brown managed only 62 yards and no touchdowns. Rumor has it he left the field midway to answer a spam call about extending his car warranty.

The Bagels’ defense forced the Sunrise offense into enough mistakes to secure the win. "We bent, we broke, then we unbroke," said a Bagel defender.

Back from injury, Nico Collins hauled in 92 yards and a touchdown. “They forgot I existed, and I can’t blame them,” Collins joked. “But they’ll remember now.”

Late in the third quarter, Roschon Johnson bulldozed his way into the end zone for a crucial touchdown that gave the Bagels momentum. Tequila’s defense looked like they were auditioning for a dance recital as they spun out of Johnson’s path.

This was a missed opportunity for the Sunrise, who had a chance to cement their dominance in the West. Instead, they now have to deal with questions about their defense and Amon-Ra’s unexpected disappearing act. Meanwhile, Cincinnati showed that when their offense clicks, they’re a tough out—even for a top team.

Tequila better hope their hangover doesn’t last too long, or the playoffs could get dicey.

Cincinnati Bagels
Pos.
Player
Stats
Points
QB
C.J. Stroud 265 yds, 2 TD's 12
RB
Christian McCaffrey 68 yds  
RB
David Montgomery 73 yds, TD 6
RB
Roschon Johnson 12 yds, TD 6
WR
Jordan Addison 162 yds, TD 9
WR
Nico Collins 92 yds, TD 6
TE
T.J. Hockenson 114 yds 3
K
Ka'imi Fairbairn 2 FG's, 3 xp's 9
DEF
Cleveland Browns 368yd, 4s, f 5
 
Total:
56
 
Tequila Sunrise
Pos.
Player
Stats
Points
QB
Patrick Mahomes 329 yds, 3 TD's 19
RB
De'Von Achane 56 yds, 2 TD's 12
RB
J.K. Dobbins 59 yds  
WR
Amon-Ra St. Brown 62 yds  
WR
Jauan Jennnings 40 yds  
WR
Romeo Doubs 54 yds  
TE
Sam LaPorta 19 yds  
K
Jake Bates FG, 3 xp's 6
DEF
Denver Broncos 369yd, 5s, i, f 7
 
Total:
44