 |
 |
|
|
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
F |
 |
|
Bagels |
8 |
55 |
7 |
0 |
70 |
 |
|
Scarecrows |
7 |
6 |
27 |
11 |
51 |
Bagels Bake the Scarecrows’ Playoff Hopes to a Crisp
In a game that epitomized "when it rains, it pours," the Cincinnati Bagels walked into South Carolina and shredded the Scarecrows' playoff aspirations like a bag of stale croutons. Final score: Cincinnati 70, South Carolina 51.
Cincinnati QB Sam Darnold—yes, that Sam Darnold—decided Week 14 was his time to shine, torching the Scarecrows’ defense for 354 yards and 5 touchdowns. Rumor has it, Darnold was so locked in that South Carolina players were seen Googling, “Who is this guy?” during the game. Sam Darnold said,: “People doubted me. They laughed at me. Who’s laughing now? I’m available for endorsements.”
“He looked like Patrick Mahomes out there,” Scarecrows owner Trevor Harless lamented post-game. “Unfortunately, we prepared for Sam Darnold.”
Wide receiver Jordan Addison was unstoppable, hauling in 133 yards and 3 TDs, single-handedly lighting up the Scarecrows’ secondary like a Christmas tree. Meanwhile, Jaylen Waddle added insult to injury with 99 yards and a 2-point conversion, even while running circles around defenders yelling, "Catch me if you can!"
Kyler Murray and the Scarecrows’ offense had flashes of brilliance, but it wasn’t enough. Murray racked up 275 yards, 2 TDs, and a 2-point conversion, keeping South Carolina in the game for a while.
The run game saw Aaron Jones and Rachaad White combine for 193 rushing yards and 3 TDs, providing some much-needed life to the Scarecrows’ offense. However, the rest of the team seemed like they were already planning their offseason vacations. Mike Evans, Mike Williams, and DeAndre Hopkins managed a combined meh performance, contributing little beyond some awkward high fives on the sideline.
The Scarecrows’ defense? Missing in action. Sam Darnold probably could’ve thrown passes blindfolded and still hit his receivers. The only bright spot for South Carolina was Brandon McManus, who nailed 4 extra points and a field goal, clearly trying to audition for a team that values his contributions. Is it bad that a kicker is called out as the bright spot?
South Carolina controlled its playoff destiny coming into this game but played like they were auditioning for America’s Got Lack of Talent. Now, their playoff dreams are officially buried under the rubble of Darnold’s breakout performance. Cincinnati, already eliminated, delivered the perfect parting gift to the Scarecrows: an early offseason.
For South Carolina, it’s a painful reminder that controlling your destiny doesn’t mean much if you forget to show up when it matters.
Cincinnati Bagels |
Pos. |
Player |
Stats |
Points |
QB |
Sam Darnold |
354 yds, 5 TD's |
33 |
RB |
David Montgomery |
84 yds, TD |
6 |
WR |
Jordan Addison |
133 yds, 3 TD's |
19 |
WR |
Marquez Valdes-Scantling |
51 yds |
|
WR |
Jaylen Waddle |
99 yds, 2pc |
2 |
WR |
Darnell Mooney |
142 yds |
1 |
TE |
T.J. Hockenson |
45 yds |
|
K |
Daniel Carlson |
2 FG's, xp |
7 |
DEF |
Cleveland Browns |
267yd, s, f |
2 |
|
|
Total: |
70 |
|
South Carolina Scarecrows |
Pos. |
Player |
Stats |
Points |
QB |
Kyler Murray |
275 yds, 2 TD's, 2pc |
14 |
RB |
Aaron Jones |
84 yds, TD |
6 |
RB |
Rachaad White |
109 yds, 2 TD's |
13 |
WR |
Mike Evans |
69 yds |
|
WR |
Mike Williams |
36 yds |
|
WR |
DeAndre Hopkins |
32 yds, TD |
6 |
TE |
Colby Parkinson |
11 yds |
|
K |
Brandon McManus |
FG, 4 xp's |
7 |
DEF |
Cincinnati Bengals |
322yd, 3s, i, f |
5 |
|
|
Total: |
51 |
|
|